Becoming a mom: the 10 unglamorous things to expect

Should we read this article or not before having a baby? The choice is yours … But keep in mind that a savvy young mother is worth two.

Leaks during pregnancy

In short, the baby’s weight is pressing on your perineum and the hormonal impregnation tends to relax your muscles. As a result, at the slightest effort, you can hardly hold back your urine. This can cause leaks when sneezing, laughing, lifting or running to catch the bus.

A few tips to play down your drama: during pregnancy, you can’t really strengthen your perineum, only try to feel the area and its reactions so that you have the reflex to “tighten” at the right time. Other ways to cope with these inconveniences: go to the bathroom often, wear discreet panty liners, and arrange for proper pelvic floor rehabilitation with a midwife a few weeks after childbirth.

The quickdraw during childbirth


The pain, the effort, the stress, no need to draw yourself a picture, you will be hot and therefore your cheeks are rosy (even scarlet), your hair is sweaty, your body wet. Add to this the pale yellow maternity gowns and / or open on the buttocks as the case may be, the absence of jewelry required by the hospital, the absence of make-up (it is only the stars to redo their features. eyeliner before going to the birth room), white neon lights… and you get a future mother… naturally!

A few tips to play down: Focused on your goal, you probably won’t think about it! Only the first photos will prove to you that this was not a nightmare. And on closer inspection, you will only remember your smiles and your tears of emotion. Note: going into a bathroom after the fight is a moment of pure delight.

Small traumas possible when pushing

You might scream, swear, bite your spouse to give you courage. But also to explode some small vessels in your eyes while pushing. Even forget you when the baby is expelled … There will be blood and water. We are not far from the scene of horror …

A few tips to play down the drama: count on the emotion that surrounds the moment with a glimmer of tenderness (we believe it). Also tell yourself that your partner is also going through a test, he will not hold it against you in this extreme state, nor is he focused on your crotch (especially if you motivate him to stay close to your chest). In short, no one can blame a champion for exulting at the end of her marathon!

Maternity’s “panties-nets”

Another joy to be expected: that of putting on maternity mesh panties (if they were orange, they could be used to wrap clementines). In fact, the first hours after childbirth, you will have to wear fairly voluminous intimate protections, hence the use of these briefs with sexy cuts and materials.

A little advice to play down the drama: invest in disposable panties to take to the maternity ward (easy to find in pharmacies). They will be less depressing (or more comfortable) than the maternity models. This is always taken for your self-esteem and comfort!

Make love again with the baby in the bedroom


You are back home whole with your lovely baby and your tired lover. After a few days of wedging (breast or bottle, cord care, friends at home) the libido could well be reinvigorated under the duvet. Except that a little inhabitant is snoozing in his basket near your bed. Weird, did you say weird?

A little advice to play down: a fulfilled parent equals a fulfilled baby. So if you are feeling the naughty soul and no medical contraindication has been asked, do not feel shy about doing yourself good! The only risk: wake up the little beast and start again for a loop: milk, diapers, lullaby …

The perineum relaxed during love

It’s a classic to be expected. As seen above, your perineal muscles have undoubtedly taken a bit of slack during pregnancy. And rehabilitation cannot start too early, especially if you are breastfeeding. As a result, at the time of penetration, you may lack sensations. Needless to say, it wasn’t Monsieur who changed his anatomy, nor even your favorite sex toy that shrunk in the wash …

A little advice to play down the drama: making love will help you strengthen your perineum. So, no reason to worry or to deprive yourself. On the contrary. After rehabilitation, everything goes back to how it was before. On the other hand, if you have had an episiotomy and the scar is tightening you, ask your midwife or gynecologist for advice.

the milk that overflows during cuddles

Moms who decide to breastfeed should know that milk can come out under strong emotion, under pressure (even moderate), without a gluttonous baby being present. Another disappointment, caresses on breasts swollen with milk can be very unpleasant.

A little advice to play down the drama: give preference to hugs after feeding, especially if breastfeeding confuses your partner a little. And take advantage of this constraint to guide your lover to other erogenous zones.

The smell of diapers in the house


It doesn’t take much to break the mood for a romantic evening. The pungent scent of a diaper rolled into a ball and forgotten in a corner of the apartment is dreadful …

A little advice to play down the drama: invest in a diaper bin and / or scented diaper bags. Empty garbage cans often. Air, burn some incense (not in the baby’s room, though). In short, think about pampering the olfactory atmosphere of the house. Guaranteed anti-depression tip.

The wardrobe at half mast

Rough maternity leggings, bleached nursing tops… you rummage through your closets looking for a decent outfit. All new mothers have experienced this period of sartorial gloom where the shabby pregnancy wardrobe has become too large, and the one before (slightly old-fashioned) no longer closes.

A little advice to play down the drama: sort out the two wardrobes and isolate in two or three drawers the least damaged parts and the most suited to your current figure. Also take out some accessories to brighten up your looks. In short, make something new with old. And if your budget allows it, invest in a few comfortable basics that will lift your spirits: a little printed dress, black jeans that make pretty buttocks, a t-shirt or an impeccable sweater, a beautiful set of lingerie to forget the briefs- filet (you deserve it).

The pregnancy “belly”… after pregnancy!

The days following the birth leave you with a very round belly which sometimes generates incongruous thoughts “Oh, you are six months old, like me!” And require you to put on your elastic waist pants.

The little advice to play down: “Nine months to do, nine months to undo” should be your motto so as not to be disillusioned. First, give your uterus time to return to its usual size. Then, give your body time to burn the fat it accumulated during pregnancy for the well-being of your baby. Breastfeeding (exclusive and over six months) will help. Then, as soon as your perineum has returned to its Olympic shape, resume regular physical activity. And if you have any love handles left, just put them to good use …

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